. : . I am Me . : .

I stopped taking my pills early March. Some may think that it is too early for me to get pregnant and have a child. But I have faith in God's decision and in myself. I am a strong woman, I have always been.

Thinking about how I got to learn the fact that I am pregnant, it is quite interesting. I could feel that I am conceiving although the 3 pregnancy test I took told me otherwise. And I keep insisting my hubby to buy me pregnant moms' milk even though the tests were negative. Finally, one day, my hubby listened to me. We bought a pack of Mamil Gold milk, as well as another pack of pregnancy test.

I was very 'ciwi'. Couldn't wait for a few days before taking the test. So, before we went to sleep that night, I quietly took the test, alone, without my hubby knowing. And, voila! The other line showed up, although not very clear. It wasn't clear, but it was there. I was trembling, not knowing how should I react to the result, so I shouted, calling my hubby who was watching telly at that time. He was so happy that he almost cried.

So the next day, we went to see a doctor. A saiko doctor. He could not believe that I am pregnant as I just stopped taking the pills for less than a month. But, hey, 'kun fa yakun'! Boleh pulak doc tu tnye, "Ni kalau betul jadi, u nak simpan ke?' I was shocked, but I answered 'Yes, of course'. Heee....benci btul ngn doc tu. Bukannye nak ckp tahniah, tnye soklan gila pulak. We are not going to that clinic ever again!

I know some of my friends are worried about how I will go through my practicum in my pregnant state. I am very positive that I will be okay. Pray for our well-being, ok? But still, I am a normal human being, not a super human. Maybe at times I will feel very dead tired, hopefully you guys can support me at those times :)

Well... I know it has been ages since I last updated my blog. My life is unbelievably busy! I have never experienced such a busy life before this. Maybe now that I am married, I have more commitment and work to do, but I still have the same amount hours like other eligible bachelors out there, which is 24 and not 48 hours! As I have less time, but more work that others, I will just write a very quick and compact updates of my current life:

1. I think I have slightly gained weight. Maybe because of blissful happiness. Tipu la kalau I kata I tak kisah, kisah jugak sikit2, sampai kena tegur dgn my hubby because I always complain that I am now fat and he doesn't think that way. Anyway, what is more important is that I lead a healthy eating habit: No junk food! (but I cannot resist sweet temptations..cakes..ice-cream...yummmmy.... ;p)

2. I now have a baby. A cute, michivieous and naughty fluffy Persian kitten, named Marsha. No photo of her yet. I am still trying to find my leisure time to do all the uploading of the photos.

3. I hate the current Malaysian education system! There are still lots of conservative educators who still believe their way of teaching is the right one. Unable to open up their old minds to accept changes. Wait till I become one of the think-tankers...

4. My beloved husband and I now have our own sweet little home (thanks to my parents-in-law). It is small and simple, but it is our heaven. Bak kate seorang ustaz, kalau nak syurga di akhirat, ia bermula dengan syurga di dunia (i.e. kedamaian & keharmonian rumahtangga).

5. I still have the rights to moan about my life now. I know I made the choice to get married early, but I am still a human being. Ciptaan Allah s.w.t. yang kerdil & lemah. Those who said: "Tu la, sape suruh kawen awal". You guys just wait for your time. All I need from you guys is your support, not that kind of reply which sometimes, hurt me :(

6. I now will treat myself by going to the hair salon on a regular basis. Thanks to Hani, whom according to my hubby, : "hei..bahaya betul kawan ngan Hani ni, ajar sayang buat benda2 yg mahal!" (p/s Hani: Abul gurau je, eheh ;p)

7. For this month (March 2009), my hubby and I have spent a total of RM 10 000 ++. However, it is because of a useful invesment: buying furnitures and other essential things for our new home. However, it still doesn't change the reality that I am now quite broke!
Haha =D (p/s Suhaimi: sorry for the kaya. It will come, but later sketla ye...).

8. Marriage life is super-duper fantastic.


That's all for now. More coming later (but I don't know when. Biasalah, hidup busy skrg nih)

Finally, after a few weeks of craziness, I have the time to update my long abandoned blog. Sampai bersawang lah kan, bak kata Suhaimi. Bukannya apa...busy sangat la dik oii... Lepas kenduri tu, kelas pun start, everyday ada kelas, and weekened busy keluar ke sana ke mari. Ni pun x berapa sihat, jadi tak pergi kelas dan berehat. Alhamdullilah...

I am sure, many will ask me, 'How your new/ married life? or Apa rasa dah kahwin?'. Honestly, I don't know how to explain it. But, of course, I am happy. Truly happy and contented. If we think we are happy that we have a girl/boy friend or fiance, that happiness can't be compared with the happiness that a marriage gives us. To have your loved one besides you every day, to see his face and to hear his voice .... it's very blissful. Betapa indah dan sucinya cinta yang Tuhan ciptakan khas untuk suami isteri. Jadi, siapa2 nak bahagia camni, kahwin la cepat2, eheh ;p

Tapi, kahwin bukanlah semata-mata hendak menghalalkan percintaan yang terlarang je. It goes far beyond that. Bagi yang mentua dah sayang, alhamdulillah lah..tapi bagi yang belum, it is a challange for you, Kahwin bukan kahwin dengan si dia je, tapi dengan semua ahli keluarga si dia jugak. As for me, kahwin dengan si dia yang ada big family, memang satu cabaran, tambahan pulak tinggal sebumbung dengan ipar :)

With marriage also, comes a big responsibility. Bukan memadu cinta asmara je. Soal komitmen sudah pasti. Bagi isteri, keperluan suami mesti diutamakan. And for the husband, jangan abaikan kebajikan & keperluan isteri. Both partners have to be sensitive and tolerant. Hehe..cakap pandai je... but I am still learning. Yelah, baru nak masuk sebulan... x pakar pun lagi.. ;p
Dulu, sebelum kahwin, pukul 9 malam masih awal. Tapi sekarang...'Hah, dah pukul 9!'. Bujang dulu, hidup rilex je...rasa lapar, makan, kalau malas masak, buat yang cincai je. Sekarang, tak leh la nak buat camtu. Baju dulu pun, liat nak iron. And now, ironing is like my new hobby. TV pun dah x sempat nak tengok. Ape dah jadi dgn Prison Break, Grey's Anatomy & Desperate Housewives pun tak tau...xde masa nak tengok. Hu....
But all that can't beat the smile of my husband when he comes home from work :))

From my experience, marriage is not that hard. For Muslims, the simple akad is what we need. But as now, most of us have been affected by globalization and materialism, the simple thing becomes an almost imppossible mission. Some may think that I got married at a very young age, but the determination is what matters most. Although I still have another year to go, it does not mean that I can't manage my life better. Ape pun yang terjadi, I believe it happens for the best.